That is exactly how we are feeling right now. It is the first day into the long weekend of public holidays and boy do we need it. We slept most of today. Considering the procedure we had yesterday, the last 1.5 months of melodrama and surrealism, the lack of sleep, the ups and downs, the stress from work, the more unnecessary stress from work, the supernatural encounters, the hormones, the tears and the laughters, the everything. How did all that happen in a short span of time? We are tired. We finally gave into the fatigue today. It was a whole lot of snoozing, dozing off in the middle of movies and videos, drifting off into the monotony of monologues and dialogues.
Finally. Rest. We have not been able to sleep for weeks. Surviving on mere hours of sleep and adrenalin and dopamine and whatever else we were feeling was taking a toll on our spirits. We think something was weighing down on us. Sometimes us human are such complex creatures that our minds play games with us, being oblivious to what is so painfully obvious and yet our subconscious fight it and thus the toll.
Let's not even discount the supernatural events around us. Scary and shocking as some of them may be, the fatigue just led us into oblivion. Come what may, knock on doors, activate electronics, call random people on our phones, we are tired. Just do whatever you want. The painful part isn't even about those event that happened, it is that the person we wanted to believe all these is skeptical. Possibly insinuating we are lying. The communication is broken. No more. Doesn't even matter any more. We have lost him. A person, a friend, a dear person, who shall probably never enter our lives again.
It is funny how sometimes we can trust some people so easily and some people not. How in an instant, we could be vulnerable and naked in soul to some people, that they see everything of us, and yet we put a front, a strong front in front of some people. And then you feel so broken because you let that person in and that person isn't worth it after all. All your insecurities, dreams, ideals, fears, exposed. That person knows your kryptonite. And this is dangerous. And now we have to change our kryptonite to protect ourselves.
It is funny how chemistry works, or how the whole universe works. What happened? Was it the stars and planets? Did we meet when some things were aligned? So tired. So exhausted. So do not want to continue feeling this way. Tragic, star crossed, period.